Badseed's Bottomline #405:
Frustration Sets In
Hey yo! This be that Badseed trying to make sense of it all and getting a big headache in the process.
Kevin Federline beat John Cena. Are you kidding me? In the biggest David Arquette moment of the year, the WWE weakened its brand and its champion by having a celebrity who just got his ass handed to him by Britney Spears win the match. I donít care who helped him win. Umaga is a glorified jobber who lost match after match as part of Three Minute Warning with a former superhero.
Then to make matters worse, later, in the main event, we see John Cena easily handle The Coach, Estrada, Umaga and Johnny Nitro in a match until he gets himself disqualified by using a chair. He lost to Federline, but beats up four guys at once. Where does this make sense? Who booked this?
DX came out and HBK dissed Kurt Angle. When you are #1, you donít acknowledge the competition. They are beneath you. The only reason you do so is because you fear them. This actually made the WWE look bad.
For a company that prides itself on having no off-season, youíd think they wouldnít air repeats, but I thought I already saw Orton and Edge ambush Flair and lay him out. Am I wrong?
Is Johnny Nitro feuding with Jeff Hardy? Oh, I was confused based on the fact that neither interacted with one another. At least have Hardy level Nitro in the Federline match before Umaga comes in. Would that have been too hard? I bet the writers thought it would be too complicated. I think the writers take the easy way out all the time.
Didnít I already see a Carlito vs. Chris Masters feud start at last yearís New Yearís Revolution? What are they doing with Carlito anyway? Talk about a travesty of justice.
Why are they wasting our time shooting vignettes with Tommy Dreamer when heís only going to get squashed by the Great Khali? And here I thought Dreamer was actually going to be getting the push. Youíd think that they would learn from the last time they tried to push that monster.
Nothing says Wrestlemania like Lashley vs. Khali.
Why run a gimmick of whether or not a team will win by knockout or tap out when there are no tag-team titles, making it pointless to have any tag-teams?
Why put Trinity with the FBI when sheís hot and can wrestle and WWE has no intention of pushing FBI? Bring them to Smackdown where a match with London and Kendrick would mean something.
RVD actually pulled out a great match from Lashley and then they end it with a horrible finish. Weíve seen people get power slammed through tables. RVD jumps and knocks Lashley off a table and weíre supposed to believe it was a trag0c move that resulted in both men being unable to compete. I heard of suspending your disbelief, but I also believe there is something to be said in treating your fans like they have some sort of intelligence.
Sabu made Test look like gold in the ring. He took bumps like no other. Unfortunately, Sabu is not a jobber and shouldnít be getting squashed the way he has been.
Balls Mahoney lost to the dreaded hand thrust to the throat finisher. How deadly?
I hate Brad Armstrong.
Chris Benoit, king of 20-plus minute matches loses a main event match to Ken Kennedy in a little over five minutes. Benoit is U.S. Champion. He lost to Kennedy in five-plus minutes. Does something else seem wrong?
Samoa Joe gave in to Kurt Angle over a girl. Are you joking? After all we saw this year, Joe wet his pants over his girl being attacked. I think Iím losing my mind.
Tomko knows Abyssí secret. Wow. I know a secret, too. Tomko canít wrestle. Iím just saying. Sorry about letting the cat out of the bag.
What happened to Stingís new look? Did someone eat too many Christmas cookies?
Final Resolution. I liked the PPV when it was called Turning Point. Can we have some new matches please?
DX does bad skits? VKM wore friggin sombreros to the ring and fought over a bullhorn. If thatís not dumb to the extreme, I donít know what it.
I wonder how much Christy Hemme gets paid to do absolutely nothing.
When does Monty Brown start with the WWE?
Can Senshi look any more ridiculous then he does in those stupid PCS skits?
Iíve had enough. Need an aspirin. This Backlund-approved column is over. Until next time, try to enjoy the matches. Peace.
For feedback, visit our message board or e-mail the author at email@example.com.
For more of Badseed's Bottomline check out our Archive!