Horror

Feast

Distributed By: Dimension Films

Executive Producers: Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Wes Craven, Chris Moore

 

Reviewed by Ismael Manzano

 

            Feast was a horror movie experience that I entered into very begrudgingly.  Unlike my usual movie choices, I did not pick to see this movie because of a powerful trailer nor did I troll the video store to find a movie with a reasonably interesting plot written on the back sleeve.  In fact, I never picked this movie at all; I’d never heard of it until I went to a friend’s house and they all but shoved the DVD into their entertainment system and insisted that I watch it.  I went along with it only because, since the moment I entered their apartment, they did not stop talking about this movie, so I figured that I might as well endure the ninety-minutes if only to shut them up for the rest of the night.  That’s how I came to see the movie; now here’s my review of it.

            Feast takes place in a remote, desert duplex-style bar, and its cast of characters include, Balthazar Getty (Brothers and Sisters), Eric Dane (Grey’s Anatomy), Jason Mewes (most Kevin Smith films), Kristen Allen (What About Brian), and Navi Rawat. (Numbers).  To give you a hint as to what type of horror movie this is, the characters are endowed with such inspiring names as Bozo, Hero, Tuffy and Heroine, just to name a few.  Other, less important characters include a handicap boy named Hot Wheels (Josh Zuckerman), a bar patron named Beer Guy (Judah Friedlander), and Drunk Girl (Chauntea Davies).

            The story promptly begins with Hero bursting into the bar, declaring that there are monsters chasing him and heading toward the bar, and calling for the patrons of the bar to rally together to save themselves.  He then delivers a line that should become a classic in cinema history, “I’m the one whose going to save your life!”—and is then immediately killed by the monsters outside.  Getting the idea yet as to what the movie is all about.  For the next hour and change, the movie progresses along this route, with characters you expected to survive dying off in violent, creative and sinfully entertaining ways, some slowly, some very quickly. 

            The monsters outside of the bar are ruthless and bloodthirsty and they have but one purpose, to do what movie monsters do best—kill.  There’s no plot really beyond that.  Everything else is a series of biting sarcasm, razor-sharp wit and so many “Holy Shit” moments that you’ll lose count halfway through the movie.  With an ever shrinking cast of heroes and heroines, will anybody in this horror movie slaughter house even survive or will the monsters control the asylum, take over the bar, and run it as only monsters can?  Trust me, by the end, nothing will seem impossible.

            So overall, this movie was a grand departure from the usual humdrum cycle of horror movies.  It’s funny, gripping, and oh-so-unrealistically violent that you’ll have to laugh.  The movie doesn’t waste time trying to build a real story; it simply has people fighting and dying and killing monsters that are nearly impossible to kill.  I’d recommend this movie to anyone who is a fan of horror movies, and anyone who is tired of the same old thing.  Feast gives you just the meat of the horror movie without trying to be something it is not and wraps it all up in a rollercoaster ride of humor and outrageousness.  Enjoy, I sure did. 

 

 


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