From the Desk of Natasia:

An Educated Kitty

by Natasia Minners
 

            As the years go by, I have begun to realize that there may be more to life than just laying around on the sofa all day, listening to the birds chirp, alternating between cleaning myself, napping and yawning.  I have grown bored with the same old routine day in and day out.  Thus, I have decided to explore new worldsÖto expand my already vast kitty horizons.  I have decided to go to school.

            Why are you laughing?  I AM NOT TOO OLD!  Iím just as young as I feel and believe me, I feel like a kitten stillÖexcept on certain nasty weather daysÖbut I digress.

            Anyways, there are quite a few classes I would like to take, but first I have to decide whether full days or single classes would be better.  If I take a full day of courses, I might be tired by the time my human comes home.  If I seem like Iím too tired around the human, she may think Iím ill and drag me to the vet.  She often does this without an excuse, but why give her a reason, right?  But I do want to expand my horizons to the fullestÖhmm, maybe just half days.  That way, I can learn new things and still be perky enough to sufficiently abuse the human, perhaps using some of the new things Iíve learned to abuse her more efficiently.

            Now, where to begin.  Let's check out what courses are available at KCU - that's Kitty Cat University for those of you non-academics.  Oh, I most certainly must take the Advanced Kitty Grooming course.  One can never know to much about how to keep themselves looking their best.  Then there is Mouse Hunting 101.  I didnít do too bad hunting mice on my own, but Iím sure that I can learn a thing or two from this class.  It says here in the course book that I have to take a gym.  Hmm, Kitty Aerobics sounds like fun, but on second thought, I think Iíll take Catnip Gymboree.  Now thereís a class I can really sink my teeth into.  Should I take Cats of the World?  Itís good to know history, but I bet I can learn all of that on Animal Planet Kitty Obedience Class?  Now thereís a ridiculous waste of money!  Who ever heard of an obedient kitty!  Puh-lease!  Ah, Kitty Choir!  I bet I can teach those kitties a thing or two!  Iíll take that one as my easy ďA.Ē

            Well, so far it looks like I have a decent sized course-load for now.  If you can think of any other courses I should be taking, feel free to email me and let me know.  Iím always opened to suggestions.  Oh, and donít worry about the expense - I have fairly easy access to my humanís bank account and have no worries about the cost of my education.  So long for now.  The next time you hear from me, Iíll be one educated kitty!
 

To read more feline prose, check out the following links:

Rascal Sees A Therapist
Rascal Sees A Therapist - Part 2
Natasia Sees A Therapist
Natasia Sees A Therapist - Part 2

Natasia Sees A Therapist - Part 3
Natasia's Note to Grandma
Natasia's Cat Toy Review
Why I Hate Halloween

My Love-Hate Relationship With Thanksgiving
Deck the Halls with Catnip Presents!
Ringing in the New Year with Catnip and Fancy Feast
Mice Beware!
Thoughts of Spring


For feedback, visit our message board or e-mail the author at natasia@g-pop-net.