Ice Princess Soundtrack

Released by Disney Records

Reviewed by Jon Minners

Click Here For The Movie Review by Justine Manzano 

    I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  Everything about that show makes me happy.  So, I am saddened when I see its stars fall on their face.  Watching Sarah Michelle Gellar in Scooby Doo 2, David Boreanaz in Crow: Wicked Prayer, Eliza Dushku running and just running in Tru Calling and then there is Michelle Trachtenberg.  She went from slaying vampires to starring in a sophomoric film like EuroTrip and just when you think things couldn’t get worse, she ends up in the film Ice Princess by the cult-like Disney Company that has sucked in so many potential superstars like Raven-Symone and Diana DeGarmo.  It is a sad day indeed. 

First off, the movie looks like utter trash - another stupid teenager movie that harps on and on about how quitting is not the answer and how hard it is to be a teen.  There are probably clichéd terms about how if you fall down in life, you should just get up, dust yourself off and try again.  I mean, this is an ice skating film and that’s what goes on in them, right?  Well, without going too far into a movie I didn’t see or ever plan on watching after seeing the all-so cutesy trailers, I will give readers another reason why the film is certain to suck – its soundtrack.

If there was ever any reason why America downloads its music illegally or if there was any reason why the coffee table coaster business has slowed dramatically, I can guarantee Ice Princess had something to do with it.  This soundtrack is an insult to my intelligence and is not even good enough to rest my coffee cup on.  Why do they even bother releasing this nonsense?  Disney soundtracks are never really good unless they are to an animated movie.  Their live soundtracks seem like watered-down versions of Radio Disney and that’s exactly what I got here. 

You would think that with stars like Jesse McCartney, Michelle Branch, Diana DeGarmo, Natasha Bedingfield and Raven-Symone that you would get a CD with even just a little value.  Nope.  It’s like these somewhat talented singers did not want to be bothered providing Disney with one of their good songs that they took the worst of the lot, slapped it together and hoped the movie was good enough to get viewers to flock to record stores for the uninspired soundtrack.  Jesse McCartney tries to do his imitation of Justin Timberlake in Get Your Shine On.  First of all, Jesse McCartney’s Beautiful Soul is one of my favorite songs, so it hurts me to have to tell him this, but never say Get Your Shine On again.  It’s not cute.  Michelle Branch shows everyone why Spirit Room was a fluke.  Diana DeGarmo lets everyone know why it was Fantasia who won American Idol and not her.  I mean, come one, Fantasia puts out music for adults and DeGarmo is stuck with boring music for kids.  At least Raven-Symone showed a little effort.  Her song Bump was fun to listen to. 

The only other songs on here I liked at all were Hayden Panettiere’s I Fly, which was catchy enough, but probably seeped into my head from the trailers like a bad, heavily repeated Clear Channel Radio song, and It’s Oh So Quiet by Lucy Woodward, which seemed perfectly suited for an ice skating exhibition and was different from any other track, because of its jazzy sound.  You win points for being unique. 

Every other song had those clichés in it.  Titles like Reach, Get Up, Just a Dream, There is No Alternative (incidentally, Tina Sugandh cannot sing to save her life.  My glasses broke.  I will send you a bill) and If I Had it My Way just demonstrate the perpetual nonsense that probably sunk the film into extreme suckitude.  Not sure what my colleague will say about the DVD, but nothing will change my mind about its soundtrack.  Listening to a Kidz Bop CD would be more fun. 

Click Here For The Movie Review by Justine Manzano 

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