From the Desk of Natasia:
Natasia's Year in Review: 2010
by Natasia Minners
Last year, I decided to partake in the silly human custom of making New Yearís resolutions. However, in perfect kitty fashion, I decided to pass up the part of the human custom that requires the human to break each and every one of those resolutions in a matter of weeks. No, that part of the tradition is just not for me. I had resolved to keep each and every resolution I made. Now that 2010 is over, I decided to review my progress.
I actually did one better on this resolution! When the time change went into effect, I completely ignored it, thus waking the human up a full two hours before she had to be up!
2. I will eat more Fancy Feast - see resolution #1.
3. I will sing louder and longer each night just before bed - a kitty needs to clear her throat on occasion and this is the perfect time to do so, despite what my human thinks.
Achieved on cue, every night and twice on Sundays!
4. It is MY couch and everyone else will be made aware of this in every way shape or form available to me. The only one allowed to sit there will be meÖall others must first ask permission before I even consider sharing.
To achieve this goal, I have made certain to spread out a number of toys on the couch so no one would even think of sitting down! Iím such a genius!
5. I will renegotiate terms regarding my allowance. My human always talks about this allowance, but I never see it. In fact, she often says that I buy presents for her and other people with this allowance I have never seen. I can only assume that my brother, Rascal, negotiated these terms - he wasnít really very knowledgeable about such things. When I am done, I will not only be receiving this allowance in the form of Fancy Feast and catnip, but I will be receiving a raise as well!
I obviously got a raise if the human was bringing me gourmet cat food!
6. The human will spend less time sitting in front of the computer and more time petting me. Trust me, I can make this happen.
To achieve this goal, I simply jumped in her lap and stood between her and the keyboard. If I couldnít get on her lap, I would howl at the foot of her chair until she picked me up - again, genius!
Once again, I prove that the feline race is much more superior to the human race. This year, I only have two resolutions to make. I resolve to make my human trip over me as much as I possibly can. I also resolve to sit in my humanís lap just as she relaxes on the couch with a steaming cup of tea or hot chocolate, thus preventing her from drinking said beverage.
I wish you and all of your loved ones a very happy new year. May your treats be plentiful, may your water dish never be empty and may your food dish overflow.
To read more feline prose, check out the following links:
Rascal Sees A Therapist
Rascal Sees A Therapist - Part 2
Natasia Sees A Therapist
Natasia Sees A Therapist - Part 2
Natasia Sees A Therapist - Part 3
Natasia's Note to Grandma
Natasia's Cat Toy Review
Why I Hate Halloween
My Love-Hate Relationship With Thanksgiving
Deck the Halls with Catnip Presents!
Ringing in the New Year with Catnip and Fancy Feast
Thoughts of Spring
An Educated Kitty
Feed Me (Fancy Feast)
My Summer Vacation
An Educated Kitty: Term 2